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10-16-2008, 03:46 PM | #1 |
just learning
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: western nc
Moto: 1996 M900
Posts: 1,348
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Why did the Chicken cross the road???
Why did the chicken cross the road?
BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change! The chicken wanted change! JOHN MCCAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road. HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me. GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here. DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun? COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road. BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your definition of chicken? AL GORE: I invented the chicken. JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it. AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens. DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes after the problem on the other side of the road... What we need to do is help him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems before adding new problems. OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life like the rest of the chickens. NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks. MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information. DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Did he cross it with a hare? Did he cross it with a bear? Didhe check if the road was hot? I kinda doubt it, I think not! Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told. Just one more thing I have to say, it's been bugging me to this very day. If the Chicken is a she, why do we keep saying HE? ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone. JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.' That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as that. GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough. BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its lifelong dream of crossing the road. ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road. JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in peace. BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook. Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much more stable and will never cra..... .#@&&^(C%..........reboot ! ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken? COLONEL SANDERS: Did I miss one? Last edited by Ducati Diva; 10-16-2008 at 03:51 PM.. |
10-16-2008, 04:02 PM | #2 |
Forum Coach
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: GA
Moto: 2006 GSXR 600
Posts: 7,419
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holy crap, thats just funny! Much needed today!!
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10-16-2008, 04:05 PM | #3 |
White Trash Hero
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: NW Arkansas
Moto: Buell 1125R Porco Rosso Edition
Posts: 4,895
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Good stuff...
And the Stephen Hawking version - "the chicken didn't actuall cross the road. It's molecules were reformed on a different time/space plane due to Quantum inconsistencies." and the Chris Smiley version "OH SHIT! It's in my lane!"
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10-16-2008, 04:57 PM | #4 |
too much time on my hands
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: the northern district of god damn
Moto: 01 ZX6R, looking for more now.
Posts: 1,802
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and then my version: OH SHIT! too late to stop. HONEY! we's havin chicken tonight!
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10-16-2008, 05:57 PM | #5 | |
Says it's time to ride
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: San Diego, CA :)
Moto: 2003 honda CBR 954/ 2011 Road King classic
Posts: 1,012
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Quote:
yes like rae said very funny good post
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10-16-2008, 06:16 PM | #6 |
Just a Noob
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Pensacola, FL
Moto: 08 Green 6R
Posts: 421
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DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?
:na: Well fuck u Cheney I thought it was the best one myself. |
10-17-2008, 09:52 AM | #7 |
Europhile
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: SoCal
Moto: Aprilia RS125, Aprilia SR50 Factory, Aprilia Tuono, BMW Rockster, KTM 990 Adventure
Posts: 1,875
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Sarah Palin: Either the chicken crosses the road or I'm gonna shoot it down from the helicopter with a high-powered rifle.
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Cogito Ergo Vroom - I think therefore I ride |
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