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Old 03-10-2009, 04:49 PM   #1
Lucky3623
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Default Happy Birthday...

Chuck Norris! 69!

Chuck was born 3 months premature because he had some asses to kick!

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Old 03-10-2009, 04:51 PM   #2
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There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.



Happy Birthday Chuck!
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Old 03-10-2009, 04:52 PM   #3
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Chuck Norris was never actually born. One day he simply decided to roundhouse his way out of the womb. Shortly after that he grew a beard.
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Old 03-10-2009, 04:53 PM   #4
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Chuck Norris sued NBC for copyright infringment...

Apparently Law and Order are the names of his left and right legs...
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Old 03-10-2009, 04:57 PM   #5
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Grandma said she doesn't want you here when she gets back because you've been ruining everybody's lives and eating all our steak.
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Old 03-10-2009, 05:16 PM   #6
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Since 1940, the year Chuck Norris was born, roundhouse-kick-related deaths have increased 13,000 percent.

When Chuck Norris was born, the nurse said, "Holy crap! That's Chuck Norris!" Then she had had sex with him. At that point, she was the third girl he had slept with.
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Old 03-10-2009, 05:23 PM   #7
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If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris, you may be seconds from death...

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars... That is why there is no sign of life there...

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is only another fist...
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Old 03-10-2009, 05:39 PM   #8
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Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.
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Old 03-10-2009, 05:40 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lucky3623 View Post
Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is only another fist...
And under Chuck Norris' hair there is only fury.
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Old 03-10-2009, 05:43 PM   #10
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Chuck Norris doesn't teabag girls, he potato sacks them.

When Chuck Norris is running late, time better slow the fuck down.

Happy Birthday old man!
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