Make it stop, or I'm going to kill you.

[askmrjesus]

"Hi, it's- SHREEKWAHWAHWAHWAHSHREEEEEEK".

Fuck me. It's her again. The customer that calls me to discuss the intricate details of the job I'm doing for her, while her toddler from hell screams into the phone.

The little fucker is like some kind of nuclear powered lamprey with a mega-phone for a head. Every time she calls me, she must have this shrieking banshee vampire attached to her head, because all I can hear is him.

It's driving me crazy.

It's starting to piss me off.

I'm charging her extra.

I'm going to use the extra money to buy a 30.06 and tranq that little bastard with a roofie dart, Mutual of Omaha style. Then I'm going to release him into the wild, so I can have a SIMPLE FUCKING CONVERSATION.

Prick.

Little miniature prick.

Stupid fucking little miniature noisy prick bastard.

I hate him.

Now then, I know you're all wondering what this has to do with the walking styles of Icelandic ponies. I know I am, because I had to stop typing and go watch an Icelandic pony "toelt". According to my wife, who thought it was necessary for me to stop typing so I could come look at an Icelandic pony do something between a trot and a canter, which proves that Icelandic ponies are smarter than other, less ice based ponies.

It is now my fervent wish, that my client's child gets an Icelandic pony for Christmas, and they both fall down a frozen well.

JC