WTF---Never again...

[Amber Lamps]

Originally Posted by OTB

I never said "Do nothing". Forgiveness is an action. It requires thought, and depending on your proclivities, maybe some prayer, too.

Doing nothing, saying nothing while still harboring ill feelings is as toxic as you say, just putting off the inevitable blow up.

Forgiveness is for MY benefit...not the person I've believed has done me wrong......

By the same token, if I have a friend who constantly does things that injure me in some manner, or who is consistently thoughtless, perhaps I need to examine why I'm friends with that person....I am not a saint, and there are toxic people that I don't need to be around.......

Yep, I said "do nothing" other than repair your bike. I don't want you to "harbor ill feelings" nor do I want you to "forgive her"... I want you to cut your losses, learn a lesson and move on. No matter how you handle this situation, this girl is going to think you're a bitch, trust me. She may apologize to your face but she will bad mouth you to your back. She obviously doesn't care about you or your stuff and she's NOT going to have some kind of epiphany because you talked to her.

I doubt that this is the first time she's done something like this to someone. My God, she so much as told you that she abused your property, "I threw it in the back of a truck" and she brought it back filthy when it left clean. She already knows the bike's condition and didn't care enough to rectify it or apologize up front.

I doubt this friendship is going anywhere, anyway... let it go. IMHO the only way that I would "forgive" her is if she came to me, unprovoked, and apologized and offered to pay for repairs. If you have to coerce her, forget it. She's your SO's friend's girlfriend, be polite but keep your distance. Who needs friends like this?