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Old 03-06-2009, 02:50 PM   #11
fasternyou929
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Holy crap I have a lot more. Where did all this angst come from. lol
I commented on CF already, but congrats on getting married!
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Old 03-06-2009, 02:56 PM   #12
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A few other tips for the NYC tourists:

Also be sure to walk slowly and erraticaly in a line in order to block the entire sidewalk during rush hour.

Don't forget to take 15 minutes to place an order for anything while an increasingly angry line stacks up behind you, exponentially increasing your chances for an asskicking.

The only way to hail a cab is standing at the back of the sidewalk as close to the building as possible. It's even more effective trying to hail a cab while you're standing 50ft back on the street, and the cab is driving up/down the avenue.

Completely block the escalators instead of standing to one side so the non-fatasses can walk up them.

Talk loudly on your cellphone while riding the train (LIRR/MTA/NJTransit)

Ask me for directions to 5th avenue while we're standing on the corner of 5th and 50th.

Get drunk as hell and randomly puke on the hood of my cab while stopped at a light in soho (that cabbie was pissed haha)

Have zero ability to understand how the subway turnstiles work.

..

Holy crap I have a lot more. Where did all this angst come from. lol
Walking smack dab against the flow of pedestrian traffic then making nasty comments and faces.
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feed your dogs root beer it will make them grow large and then you can ride them and pet the motorcycle while drinking root beer
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Old 03-06-2009, 02:58 PM   #13
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Normally I would take that from the likes of you....but since the only reference I have is the guy with the plucked eyebrows and rosy cheeks who is engaged to Carolina...I'm going to let it go.

You remind me of one the little porcelain cherub statues my grandmother used to keep in the living room. She used to always bring me Hess Trucks..

since I associate you with Hess Trucks...I'm going to let your comment go.

Once you and Carolina are married, all bets are off.
You do realize.. fuck with Tracy.. and you have to answer to me, bubba.










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Old 03-06-2009, 03:03 PM   #14
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Yeah, because the locals aren't snooty at all.
That may be.. But, they know the directions.
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:04 PM   #15
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That may be.. But, they know the directions.
Yeah, and I know the directions around Austin, but I'm not going to act like a jackass when someone asks for directions. Just sayin'...
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"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time. It was impossible."
- Hunter S. Thompson, Song of the Sausage Creature

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because those who mind don't matter
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:05 PM   #16
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You do realize.. fuck with Tracy.. and you have to answer to me, bubba.










Tracy and Carolina...

Sorry...but I still feel that you sound like an old lesbian couple.
and now that you put up the little sniper rifle smily...I'm thinking that "Tracy and Carolina" is the script for the sequel to Thelma and Louise.
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feed your dogs root beer it will make them grow large and then you can ride them and pet the motorcycle while drinking root beer
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:06 PM   #17
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Yeah, and I know the directions around Austin, but I'm not going to act like a jackass when someone asks for directions. Just sayin'...
The key is not to act like a jackass WHEN ASKING FOR directions.
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feed your dogs root beer it will make them grow large and then you can ride them and pet the motorcycle while drinking root beer
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:07 PM   #18
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Tracy and Carolina...

Sorry...but I still feel that you sound like an old lesbian couple.
and now that you put up the little sniper rifle smily...I'm thinking that "Tracy and Carolina" is the script for the sequel to Thelma and Louise.
Nah, Tracy's buddies already took the sequel to that..
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"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time. It was impossible."
- Hunter S. Thompson, Song of the Sausage Creature

"Be who you are and say what you feel
because those who mind don't matter
and those who matter don't mind."
-Dr. Seuss
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Old 03-06-2009, 03:08 PM   #19
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The key is not to act like a jackass WHEN ASKING FOR directions.
Truth. Although I've heard stories of dem thar Yanks giving wrong directions just because.. well, because.
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"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time. It was impossible."
- Hunter S. Thompson, Song of the Sausage Creature

"Be who you are and say what you feel
because those who mind don't matter
and those who matter don't mind."
-Dr. Seuss
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Old 03-06-2009, 04:24 PM   #20
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Truth. Although I've heard stories of dem thar Yanks giving wrong directions just because.. well, because.

Just cuz it makes things a little more interested
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