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Old 04-10-2009, 02:15 PM   #51
julie j
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My husband I moved in together after 5 months of knowing each other. I was 18, he was 19. We did not get married until 9 years later and this year is our 20th year together. I think couples should live together before marriage but they don’t have to do it for 9 years.
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Old 04-10-2009, 02:43 PM   #52
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1 and that was the only one. Dated for about 4 years, 1 in highschool and 3 in college. The 3 years in college we lived together until she decided she needed time (see: sleep with town).

Then she moved out, my rent went way the fuck back up and I became a much happier independent person.
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Old 04-10-2009, 02:45 PM   #53
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zero til I got married, I never even had a roommate. Fuck living with other people, they just piss you off. My wife is lucky I live with her.
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Old 04-10-2009, 02:54 PM   #54
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My hubby and I didn't live together until we were married. So none for me

I don't think there is a magic formula for how long you should do this and that for your relationship to last. I think every relationship is different.

I get kinda offended when people say that you should live together before you get married. Just because that's what worked for you doesn't mean that's what will work for everyone.

For my relationship, I know that had we been just living together and not married when things got rough we would have given up. But because getting a divorce was much more involved than just moving out, we stuck it out. And had we not we would have been missing out on the great relationship we have now.

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Old 04-10-2009, 02:59 PM   #55
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2. Glad I lived with the fiance before we were married. It was a lot cheaper to realize how retarded somebody can be when you live with them.

Kell, I don't think you realize how much you can despise somebody you used to love because of the things you don't know they did when you weren't around.
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Old 04-10-2009, 03:01 PM   #56
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I lived with 2 Ex-boyfriends in the past and am glad I did. You do learn a lot more about a person when you share the same space 24/7. I wouldn't even consider marrying someone I didn't live with first.

And for many that think they are so used to living alone how could I ever live with someone, why would I want too etc.? When you find the RIGHT person it's makes all the difference, you want them there...

I currently live with my boyfriend and we are as happy now, if not more, as before we moved in.
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Old 04-10-2009, 03:09 PM   #57
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The older you get, the more set in your ways you become. So for people like me who are old, lol.......I would be very nervous about getting married and then learning something about her or me that causes the marriage to break down.

I can see how waiting until after the wedding makes things seem more "special". My sister lived with someone for 5-6 years before marrying him, and I kind of wondered how special the wedding could possibly be after all that time. But IMO it's better than having to break your vows because you didn't know enough about yourself or your SO.

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Old 04-10-2009, 03:20 PM   #58
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Very True! but when you find the right person you can be more willing to make small changes than you think. One thing I will say is its easier if you are both moving into a new place together than one of you moving in with the other. You have your territory sort of 'claimed' at that point and someone moving things around might bother some people. A new place means no existing habits are formed yet and you can do that together.

But if it's meant to work then it will work whether you live together or not
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Old 04-10-2009, 03:20 PM   #59
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Old 04-10-2009, 05:17 PM   #60
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Everyone is different but for me living together is like marriage....and I just don't want to do it until I'm actually married.

I think anything I'd find out about that person in the course of our relationship would be enough. It's not like I'm going to end a perfectly good relationship because he can't put his socks in the hamper?

It's kind of like "why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free".
Totally agree Kel. I lived with someone for 7 years. I can't remember at what point he asked me to marry him but it was pretty far into it. By the time he finally asked me I didn't want to anymore. I gave him his ring back and moved out.
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