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Old 06-15-2009, 05:00 PM   #71
askmrjesus
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Chi " However, blatantly going out and getting snipped, without first talking to your wife, your PARTNER, and lying or not being straightforward robs her of her chance to make a clean break, and go do her own thing."

I just don't think he should have to discuss this with her beforehand. Sure pretending to want to have kids would be despicable and I only said it in jest BUT getting fixed is merely a logical step in the direction that he proposed to her in the first place. Again he has been somewhat foolish up til this point by not getting fixed imho. If he knew that he felt this way he should have had it done a long time ago!
Dude, can you see China yet?

JC
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:06 PM   #72
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I've known SEVERAL women who openly admit to getting pregnant on purpose. They need to hurry up with that birth control shot for men!
Last time I checked it took 2 to tango. Don't want her getting pregnant (accidentally or otherwise)? Wrap that shit up and insist on it. Simple as right? Oooh yeah....too many guys don't want to do that and then dump all the responsibility on someone else. Does it make what she does right? Hell no....but man up and take responsibility for what YOU did.
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:09 PM   #73
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Im sorry sweetie, I thought I gave you kudos earlier!! You were dead on with that post!! *hug*

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Dude, can you see China yet?

JC
Oh holy hell, sorry JC, thats funny.

I just give up. I knew Tig had a skewed vision of a reasonable and good relationship, but all the statements made today show he has NO IDEA what a real, loving, caring, trusting and real relationship is made up of.

Here Tig, here's something to remember that others already know:

If you have to "protect" yourself from your woman to not have kids, thats not a relationship.

If your woman runs around on you while your in the desert, thats not a real relationship (on her part obviously).

If you would go out and make some life changing decision without your significant other, than obviously they ARENT significant and it ISNT a real relationship.

It makes me slightly sad for you that you apparently have never had a real, meaningful, trusting loving relationship. Perhaps you are with the wrong kinda woman? (Not making an offer, just saying.)
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:16 PM   #74
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Wow, from the first to the last page this turned into one hell of a conversation.

Yeh um, getting snipped was the greatest thing Ive ever done, insurance covered it, I drove home from the hospital but I really shouldn't have, and there is no way you can hide it, because you will have stiches, and ice on your balls, and if you don't ice them they grow huge, then scars after. Be honest and tell her no kids.
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:17 PM   #75
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Jesus Tig, which brings me back to the mindset that if you have to "protect yourself" from your wife, why the hell are you in a relationship?!
and Hahahaha! Seriously, you've been up that road yourself. Shit why even get married if you don't want kids? Unfortunately, you do have to protect yourself from your spouse. I didn't always believe this, even though everything in my upbringing told me it was true...

Be honest, are all of your finances tied together? Are you cosigned on all of his loans and vice-verse? Are all of your bank accounts joint? Every credit card? Does he know EVERY dirty little secret about you? Are you protecting yourself, even a little?

You keep saying that he should discuss this with her first... Okay but what if she says "no", then what?
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:18 PM   #76
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And if you really don't want kids try this:

1-run out of condoms
2-convince her that tin foil is a good alternative
3-sex
4-problem solved
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:25 PM   #77
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At least someone gets what Im trying to say here...
Yeah, someone who won't be stuck paying child support for 18 years because some woman decided to have an "accident".
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:29 PM   #78
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Originally Posted by TIGGER View Post
and Hahahaha! Seriously, you've been up that road yourself. Shit why even get married if you don't want kids? Unfortunately, you do have to protect yourself from your spouse. I didn't always believe this, even though everything in my upbringing told me it was true...

Be honest, are all of your finances tied together? Are you cosigned on all of his loans and vice-verse? Are all of your bank accounts joint? Every credit card? Does he know EVERY dirty little secret about you? Are you protecting yourself, even a little?

You keep saying that he should discuss this with her first... Okay but what if she says "no", then what?
Everyone has their own reasons for getting married. You had yours, I had mine, with the understanding that there would never be kids, I cant help it he decided later he wanted them, nor can Triple help that she wants kids and didnt pay good attention when they got married that there would never be kids.

With my ex husband, yes, everything and I mean EVERYTHING was tied together, and I am still paying for it. But there was no need to "protect" myself from him. As for the kids thing, I took BC and he used protection, or he got no sex, plain and simple, and brutally honest and upfront. And yes, he knew every little secret, and every account was shared. He was my life partner, why wouldnt I want to share with him? (I operate on the honesty policy, if I tell you now, when it hops out of the closet later, no surprises and no right to get pissed as if you didnt know.)

If they talk, she doesnt like it, she either accepts it, or she can leave. There really is no discussion from the way Triple stated it. He doesnt want kids, he wont be changing his mind, he told her from the start. He sits her down, tells her he is having the procedure, if shes good with it, great, if not, they arent meant to be.

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Originally Posted by derf View Post
And if you really don't want kids try this:

1-run out of condoms
2-convince her that tin foil is a good alternative
3-sex
4-problem solved
How bout "NO SEX"?
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:30 PM   #79
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Last time I checked it took 2 to tango. Don't want her getting pregnant (accidentally or otherwise)? Wrap that shit up and insist on it. Simple as right? Oooh yeah....too many guys don't want to do that and then dump all the responsibility on someone else. Does it make what she does right? Hell no....but man up and take responsibility for what YOU did.
You pm'd me all hurt and whatnot and asked me not to "attack" you. I have lived up to that promise but you are making it difficult...
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Old 06-15-2009, 05:31 PM   #80
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Yeah, someone who won't be stuck paying child support for 18 years because some woman decided to have an "accident".
Hey Mr "read only what you want to see", it takes TWO!! You dont want babies, dont make "boom boom". Its that easy. If you dont trust her, you shouldnt be sleeping with her! Who knows what she might give you in return besides a child!
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