Second Hand Smoke

askmrjesus · 09-10-2009, 11:46 PM

I went down to my local "Bike Night" last night. It's not your typical squids on GXSR's trying to pick up Hooters waitresses bike night, more of a bunch of old dudes on vintage bikes and dual sports kind of a thing. Weird crowd. Interesting mix.

We meet up at a micro brewery in the seedy part of town. Nothing fancy. Good beer, pretzels with stone ground mustard, ugly women. The bar is in a converted industrial building, with a big roll up door at the front. In the summer they leave the door open, so you can gaze out at the landscape of weed encrusted pavement, and the peeling paint of the abandoned building across the street. I like it there.

I'm having a beer and a smoke with a few of my riding buds out on the sidewalk, when a dude I've seen around a few times come out of the bar, and jumps on a semi-kinda almost street-legal KTM two-stroke, that's parked in front of the big roll up door. He fires the thing up about 6 feet from a table of non-descript khaki wearing tourists, and proceeds to wring the fucking shit out it.

At first I'm thinking, Ok, you made your point, time to move along. But no, Mr. Blipie isn't done yet. He keeps whacking the throttle like he's expecting fucking nickles to come out the back end. He's pumped enough smoke into the bar to hide a goddamn battle ship. The folks inside are starting to get pissed. The chorus of "Hey, Asshole!", is falling on deaf ears. He's oblivious. The bar folk start throwing mustard covered pretzels at him. He has about 5 of them stuck to the back of his jacket, but he's still whacking that damn throttle.

I was just about to say something to him, when the barmaid came out, and yelled "Hey! Dickweed! You're smoking us to death in here!".

His reply?

"I know, it smokes a lot when the choke is on!"

Really?

No shit.

JC

karl_1052 · 09-10-2009, 11:56 PM

I had the same thing happen to me at a cheesey guido bar on my RD350LC.

I thought it was funny.(it was around 32F that night, so it was really smoking)

Gas Man · 09-11-2009, 12:42 AM

Squids come in all shapes and sizes.

Papa_Complex · 09-11-2009, 07:58 AM

OK, so there's a good part of town?

neebelung · 09-11-2009, 08:03 AM

I have to say, he's a dickweed we've all encountered, but your description of it (esp the mustard pretzels sticking to him) had me

Apoc · 09-11-2009, 08:19 AM

You've obviously never tried to walk through the parking lot of a snowmobile club to try and get a meal.

Two strokes smoke alot (they burn oil, what do you expect?) and they have to warm up, or the pistons turn into hand grenades. Suck it up buttercup. As a motorcyclist, you should love the smell and the smoke. Poser.

In the winter, if you walk in the garage here, your greeted with a mixed smell of pot smoke and 2-stroke smoke. Its like a gourmet meal for your nose.

Papa_Complex · 09-11-2009, 08:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Apoc

You've obviously never tried to walk through the parking lot of a snowmobile club to try and get a meal.

Two strokes smoke alot (they burn oil, what do you expect?) and they have to warm up, or the pistons turn into hand grenades. Suck it up buttercup. As a motorcyclist, you should love the smell and the smoke. Poser.

In the winter, if you walk in the garage here, your greeted with a mixed smell of pot smoke and 2-stroke smoke. Its like a gourmet meal for your nose.

I'm guessing that not many snowmobilers have the opportunity to point their machines into the propped open door of a bar.

Apoc · 09-11-2009, 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Papa_Complex

I'm guessing that not many snowmobilers have the opportunity to point their machines into the propped open door of a bar.

I said like it!

askmrjesus · 09-11-2009, 08:38 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Apoc

You've obviously never tried to walk through the parking lot of a snowmobile club to try and get a meal.

I'll put that on my "To Do" list. Should fit in nicely between freezing to death, and donating a kidney.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Apoc

Two strokes smoke alot (they burn oil, what do you expect?) and they have to warm up, or the pistons turn into hand grenades. Suck it up buttercup. As a motorcyclist, you should love the smell and the smoke. Poser.

It's a question of manners. There's a difference between the sweet smell of Castor beans in the air, and being trapped in a giant bong.

Is it just me, or did a guy with a Harley just call me a poser?

JC

Apoc · 09-11-2009, 08:42 AM

I ride my Harley, I dont hang out at bike nights

09-10-2009, 11:46 PM	#1
askmrjesus Soul Man Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Everywhere, all the time. Moto: '0000 Custom Turbo Cross (with jet kit). Posts: 6,481	Second Hand Smoke I went down to my local "Bike Night" last night. It's not your typical squids on GXSR's trying to pick up Hooters waitresses bike night, more of a bunch of old dudes on vintage bikes and dual sports kind of a thing. Weird crowd. Interesting mix. We meet up at a micro brewery in the seedy part of town. Nothing fancy. Good beer, pretzels with stone ground mustard, ugly women. The bar is in a converted industrial building, with a big roll up door at the front. In the summer they leave the door open, so you can gaze out at the landscape of weed encrusted pavement, and the peeling paint of the abandoned building across the street. I like it there. I'm having a beer and a smoke with a few of my riding buds out on the sidewalk, when a dude I've seen around a few times come out of the bar, and jumps on a semi-kinda almost street-legal KTM two-stroke, that's parked in front of the big roll up door. He fires the thing up about 6 feet from a table of non-descript khaki wearing tourists, and proceeds to wring the fucking shit out it. At first I'm thinking, Ok, you made your point, time to move along. But no, Mr. Blipie isn't done yet. He keeps whacking the throttle like he's expecting fucking nickles to come out the back end. He's pumped enough smoke into the bar to hide a goddamn battle ship. The folks inside are starting to get pissed. The chorus of "Hey, Asshole!", is falling on deaf ears. He's oblivious. The bar folk start throwing mustard covered pretzels at him. He has about 5 of them stuck to the back of his jacket, but he's still whacking that damn throttle. I was just about to say something to him, when the barmaid came out, and yelled "Hey! Dickweed! You're smoking us to death in here!". His reply? "I know, it smokes a lot when the choke is on!" Really? No shit. JC __________________ The way things are going, they're gonna crucify me.

09-10-2009, 11:56 PM	#2
karl_1052 sergeant hatred Join Date: Jul 2009 Location: Ottawa Moto: The bus Posts: 2,723	I had the same thing happen to me at a cheesey guido bar on my RD350LC. I thought it was funny.(it was around 32F that night, so it was really smoking) __________________ My wife was afraid of the dark...then she saw me naked and now she's afraid of the light.

09-11-2009, 12:42 AM	#3
Gas Man Trip's Assistant Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Imported from Detroit Moto: 2009 HD Street Classic Posts: 12,149	Squids come in all shapes and sizes. __________________ -Chris "Why pay somebody else to fuck up your bike?" Run Amsoil Product

09-11-2009, 07:58 AM	#4
Papa_Complex Nomadic Tribesman Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Brampton, Canada Moto: '09 ER-6n Posts: 11,150	OK, so there's a good part of town? __________________ "Everything's better with pirates." - Lodge, "Dorkness Rising" http://www.morallyambiguous.net/

09-11-2009, 08:03 AM	#5
neebelung Ornery, scandalous & evil Join Date: Feb 2008 Location: Jacksonville, FL Moto: 2004 Scarlet R1 Posts: 5,962	I have to say, he's a dickweed we've all encountered, but your description of it (esp the mustard pretzels sticking to him) had me

09-11-2009, 08:19 AM	#6
Apoc For Science. You Monster. Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Canada Moto: '08 HD FLSTSB Posts: 3,546	You've obviously never tried to walk through the parking lot of a snowmobile club to try and get a meal. Two strokes smoke alot (they burn oil, what do you expect?) and they have to warm up, or the pistons turn into hand grenades. Suck it up buttercup. As a motorcyclist, you should love the smell and the smoke. Poser. In the winter, if you walk in the garage here, your greeted with a mixed smell of pot smoke and 2-stroke smoke. Its like a gourmet meal for your nose.

09-11-2009, 08:42 AM	#10
Apoc For Science. You Monster. Join Date: Nov 2008 Location: Canada Moto: '08 HD FLSTSB Posts: 3,546	I ride my Harley, I dont hang out at bike nights