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Old 12-16-2010, 10:11 AM   #1
Kaneman
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Default Have you smacked a child today?

If not, get to work. The day is young and there are (apparently) many children in serious need of a beatdown.

Sorry, I was reminded of how shitty most kids are during a shopping trip yesterday. So please, as the Christmas season approaches and the stores flood with mindless zombie shoppers, give an unruly child a friendly reminder of how easily someone with 4x their body mass can destroy them.

While you're at it, kick their father in the balls....he's a disgrace to testicles anyway.
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:19 AM   #2
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If not, get to work. The day is young and there are (apparently) many children in serious need of a beatdown.

Sorry, I was reminded of how shitty most kids are during a shopping trip yesterday. So please, as the Christmas season approaches and the stores flood with mindless zombie shoppers, give an unruly child a friendly reminder of how easily someone with 4x their body mass can destroy them.

While you're at it, kick their father in the balls....he's a disgrace to testicles anyway.
kids? I'd rather smack the shit out of most of the adults in stores right now. It sucks that I have been very busy and haven't gotten any shopping done this year. Yes I'll be going out in late Dec to deal with the uber rude fucks who think the sea of shoppers should part and let them through because they are IMPORTANT damn it!!!!! I love telling people "happy holidays" very politely after they bump into you just to see their reaction. even that game gets old though.
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:20 AM   #3
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Cue azoom in 5..4..3..2..
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:21 AM   #4
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I love you Josh.
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:27 AM   #5
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kids? I'd rather smack the shit out of most of the adults in stores right now.
That too...but damn people...beat you kids regularly so "WE" won't have too!!!

The lack of a good healthy fear of a smack or bust on the ass is what's wrong with people these days Dr Spock did us NO favors by telling parents to never touch your child and NEVER tell them no. Thus giving them boundries.

This lack of boundries is the reason so many adult are just plain useless idiots that contribute nothing to society


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Old 12-16-2010, 10:29 AM   #6
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All I wanted to do was go out and buy a new couch. Who the fuck lets their kid JUMP on couches and beds in the store? Apparently everyone who shops for furniture with their kid, that's who. Man if my kid did that I'd have to put him up for adoption and kill myself for being a total failure as a human being.

And throwing a fit? WHO THE FUCK LETS THEIR KID THROW A FIT IN THE STORE?!?!? Speak up so that I can make fun of you, because you're a fucking moron. A kid weighs 50-125lbs....and you can't control them? Get out...just get out. I don't mean out of the store, I mean out of Earth...get the fuck out of Earth because you're wasting my oxygen and my water. Just go.
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:31 AM   #7
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Cue azoom in 5..4..3..2..
Fuck that - I'm all for beating other people's children

I am currently disabled - I had knee surgery last week and will be on crutches for the next seven weeks. I am becoming more and more jaded toward the general public as individuals and the herd.

I swear, I'm going to get taken in for assault if one more whining, screaming child tries to take out one of my crutches...
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:34 AM   #8
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I swear, I'm going to get taken in for assault if one more whining, screaming child tries to take out one of my crutches...
I was in Braums the other day picking up some Milk and some BAREFOOT screaming 5 year old boy comes running up behind me and slaps me on the back. First of all, put some fucking shoes on....holy shit they make and sell food in here, you fucking ignorant redneck asshole.

Secondly, if you hit me again I'm literally going to choke you until you pass out....and I'm not going to set you down gently either.

Self defense motherfucker.
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:42 AM   #9
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I was in Braums the other day picking up some Milk and some BAREFOOT screaming 5 year old boy comes running up behind me and slaps me on the back. First of all, put some fucking shoes on....holy shit they make and sell food in here, you fucking ignorant redneck asshole.

Secondly, if you hit me again I'm literally going to choke you until you pass out....and I'm not going to set you down gently either.

Self defense motherfucker.
Yeah, I don't get it either. Not at all. Not in any way. Control your offspring.

And, while your at it, teach them some courtesy. When someone says, "Excuse me" it's usually because you're in the FUCKING WAY.

My reflexes have gotten incredible.
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Old 12-16-2010, 10:57 AM   #10
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I'll get right on that. What's the cut-off point? 23? 24?
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